Party at the Lizzos

Family party in which I was emersed in a sea of respective girl/boyfriends all alone. The first of many, unfortunately. I'm beyond disgusted with that. It wouldn't be so bad if they didn't take these people everywhere. Damn boring family members.

Ugh... and that Ashley. Ugh seeing Jen with her. Disgust. It's bad enough she bothered me my entire life but to sit and beam at MY education, please. There's nothing more I can't stand about the woman than her habit of taking credit for things she didn't do, or for that matter, pay for. But a happy Jen is a paying Charlie. And I'm taking every cent until May.

I do not enjoy taking directions from anyone on how to live my life. It's mine. I can judge and I got here all on my own will. I don't need any advice on anyone. I'm tired of people knocking Chris when I've supported every last one of their relationships, even if I knew nothing good can come of them. My happiness should be worth more than their predjudices. And since when are these people worthy judges of character?

Am feeling restless and impatient lately. I want to be out of here so badly. It gets unbearable most at these times, everyone and their worthless advice. Asking me to do them favors when they can't help me out. And the major issue is, their never going to see fault on their own side. These people work my nerves. They don't even know any better. Why should I be expected to help out with something that didn't involve me at all? Why should I be asked to support this nonsense that barred me out even farther? Why am I expected to go on smiling like an idiot when it is so obvious that I am owed an apology.

I'm not asking for much. Just tell me you know. Tell me you see it that you were wrong and that it shouldn't have been like this. Give me what is owed to me. I've fought so hard, so hard I can hardly recognize kindness when it comes my way, and poor men like Chrissy here are left to deal with the remains.

I need to leave ti all. To go. I'm ready to leave this city, this home. I'm ready.