So okay it's the second day of being utterly alone, unhappy, and heartbroken. But I'm standing pretty well, considering the fact I go through phases, some wanting to slash some tires, others wanting to cry under my desk in utter, impenatrable and endless despair. But overall displaying a feeling of knowing things need to move along. Which is why I'm writing today, Chrissy can't have this either, pride or none.
Work going along smoothly, worried a bit too smoothly. Is so different to be a proffessional these days. Nearly was arrested this afternoon for examining packaging for men's thongs. Sixten is feeling the burn, too. It is good to have a commiserary in-office, even if down the hall. We had a good laugh though, Lady and the Tramp, how I am replaced by my antithesis. He says what everyone says, it's not that serious; I did better. Six, it isn't the thought of losing a scrub, it's the thought of losing.
My life has become a struggle; I'm so exhausted at the end of the day. I've forgiven and unforgiven 20 times today. There is nothing better for disappointments than work. And I put heart and soul into those thongs. (and some Italian tourists...)
Long and wonderful life ahead. Even if the rain falls harder on my head these days. Can't even bring myself to put on eyeliner; most of me just wants to lie in bed and listen to sad ballads of women scorned. I refuse to let that happen. Not for "Chrissy," not for his India. Not for all the lies, all the garbage he gave. I'm going to succeed and do it better than any of the other girls on my floor. I'm getting my MBA and my liscense. This won't stop me. This won't be on my mind a week from now. I'm going to be better. I'm only 22. There are so many reasons to be strong, and you're always stronger than you think.
I just have a headache. I can't do this right now.
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