Every Woman

Feeling optimistic as the days go by. Company layoffs have us down, but there's something positive in the air, I feel it.

I felt absolutely beautiful today for the first time in weeks. And genuinely, genuinely happy. B and I went to the Library, now one of my favorite places. I'm to have dinner with a British financier tomorrow at a favorite Indian restaurant and got a call from my beloved class action lawyer. I'm excited, once again seeing positives in dating. Me and D. are closer than ever, wonder if he'd go out with me sometime? Could you imagine asking?! Drinks with Jess later in the week, hopefully.

Reading my book on Jackie O., the latest of my library acquisitions. It's amazing how strong we women can be when we want to. I'm inspired by her story and the stories of the other women I've been fortunate to find books on; Diana and Madonna. You have to come out of disappointment a star; especially emotional disappointment. You cannot give up, nor deny yourself of the potential in other areas of your life. I'm working harder everyday, fixing my accent, getting thinner, trying my hand at listening, trying to exhibit more of the intellect and less of the diva. A touch of class...I can learn to forgive if they don't lie anymore. It's a compromise.

But the greatest beauty now, is I don't live with horrid uncertainty. I don't feel as if I'm fighting an uphill battle.I know where I'm belonging and feeling comfortable in my new roles. What matters most to me now is developing as an employee, a student, and a friend. I love my job more than ever, as its become a place to express my creative and practical side. I want to develop into a good leader, one of the kind of sophisticated women who I've had the pleasure to work for. I want to be a force to be reckoned with.

When I drove past the movie theater this week, I saw something I'd never noticed there before... a flock of good news geese all about the ice. Everyone stared at me as I broke into laughter, throwing my arms in the air with jubilation.